Hurry up and wait

Diagramming at the Morden Legion; February 2016.

11 month old Lil' Water. Walter and his mama. Rosenort, MB; February 2016.

Walter walking a blue streak towards his dad. Rosenort, MB; February 2016.

Portrait of an armful: my ma holding JJ who holds his little sister, sweet B. Winnipeg, MB; January 2016.

Pa Kettle, the baby whisperer. 

Ni in his corner. Winnipeg, MB; February 2016.

Ten month old Gus taking in the sights from his Chariot vantage point. Winnipeg, MB; February 2016.

Christmas Eve portrait of my parents in their yard. Rosenort, MB; December 2015.

Christmas Eve portrait of Ni and I outside my parent's house. 

Amelia on my stoop in late summer. Winnipeg, MB; September 2015.

A funny found negative from Harvest Moon Festival. Clearwater, MB; September 2015.

Inspiration on Rorie Street. Winnipeg, MB; February 2016.

Finally processed the many rolls that were clackin' around in my print apron. I'm saving my pennies and thus it was a job for the home scanner. This batch of 120 Delta 400 came out EXCEPTIONALLY gritty and quite wretched, though a part of me found them quite fitting considering the gritty and wretched seasonal limbo Winnipeg is lurking in at the moment.

Spring / Winter / Spring / Winter

Flip / Flop / Flip / Flop

Dry / Wet / Dry / Wet

Dark  / Light / Dark / Light

Exposed / Unexposed / Exposed / Unexposed

The seasonal flip-flopping is quite brutal but the warmth of the March sun encourages me to carry on tight lipped. Nothing I can do but move through the slop like the rest of my fellow city slickers and countryside folk. Splash pants and rubber boots. Dogshit and cigarette butts. Lost shoes and wet trash. Somehow the green always manages to cut a path through the grit.

I was walking with Leo yesterday down an alleyway toward the twins' place after four and his attitude toward this time of year was so inspiring! He picked up every piece of trash he found on the ground as if it were some magical treasure. At one point he looked at me as we dumped our treasure into a bin, and he said with such an intensity, "taking care of the Earth is our only job Megan". You said it kid.

Four year olds man, four year olds.

*Kiev 60 / 120 Delta 400 processed and scanned at home / begging to be printed.

Deer Seer

Portrait of Leo's ice cream. Art City Snowball. Winnipeg, MB; February, 2016.

I sat up in bed on Saturday morning after waking from a powerful dream. In the dream I was sitting in a naturally lit lounge area of a mall surrounded by healthy plants. Suddenly I saw this boy from my class zoom through a cafeteria in front of me. Instinctively, I began to chase after him. He pulled all of the tricks he knew as we ran through the place. I finally caught up to him in a crowded and incredibly noisy restaurant. As I held him in my arms, his body begin to morph into a little fawn with the softest body on long spindly legs and the biggest brown eyes you ever did see.

Then I woke.

I made coffee and then a list at the kitchen table as I thought about him. His eyes. Those expressive dark eyebrows that often speak volumes more than he does. I put down my pen and picked up my telephone. I checked Instagram and the first thing I saw was a post from an old good friend Demetra. She had posted a photo captured through her living room window. Just beyond the lace curtains lay a group of deer basking in the spring sun. Below the photo she wrote:

"Deer medicine teaches us to use the power of gentleness to touch the hearts and minds of wounded beings who are trying to keep us at bay. Deer has the gentleness of spirit that heals all wounds. Deer does not push to get others to change, Deer loves them as they are. Deer folks apply gentleness to a situation and become like the summer breeze: warm and caring. 

Deer folk carry the message of purity of purpose; of walking in the light to dispel shadows. They know the work that they must do, and go about that work with no fanfare and no need for personal glory or recognition. 

Deer blend well with their environment but are very sensitive to every sound or movement. They are often described as being swift and alert. They are intuitive, often appearing to have well developed, even extra sensory perceptions. Some times their thoughts seem to race ahead, and they appear not to be listening. 

There are no shadows about deer; not ulterior motives; no hidden agendas; no lies or misrepresentations, and it is not possible for deer to knowingly hurt anyone or anything"

- author unknown

////\\\\

When the universe sends such a clear message, there is nothing left to do but apply the lesson. I feel so incredibly challenged and charged by my work teaching the Montessori method to little ones. There really are no words to describe the many funny exchanges I share with little kids on a daily basis. It is such a different rhythm than I used to know. But slowly, I am learning the new dance and steadily I feel myself relaxing into the new role and just having fun with it. Less worrying about the future. More enjoying the moment. Perhaps this is good, clear sign of aging. I am growing into a wiser woman and I am proud of that. There is still much to learn. Next year I will teach full days and really sink my teeth into it.

Most days I teach until two in the afternoon and then zip home in time to pick up Leo from school and then scoot over to pal around with Noam and Effie until the sun goes down. Montessori in the morning and then free play in the afternoon. This is how I roll these days. On Friday we cruised around the neighborhood for two hours. No complaints about wet boots or hungry bellies, just delight. I shot a bazillion photos of the three boys on their respective push bikes and scooter. They are at the amazing age (4 and 5) where they genuinely want to understand how every little thing works. Cameras provide endless amounts of entertainment and teaching opportunities. We cruised to the camera shop on Friday ('twas a big ordeal for them to cross Portage apparently) and picked up film to load their cameras with. In half an hour we will start shooting. Then we will process the magic. Then we will make contact sheets. And then we will print!

Life is good.

Spring is flippen' IN.

MP